Do You Love Me?
John 21:15-19
In 1949, Jim Elliot graduated with highest honors from Wheaton College in Illinois. He was someone who journaled extensively. His complete works may be found in The Journals of Jim Elliot, compiled and edited by his wife and author Elisabeth Elliot. On October 28, 1949, Elliot wrote these prophetic words in his journal: “He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.” He believed that with all of his heart, and his life proved it. Six years later, at the young age of twenty-eight, Jim Elliot and four missionary comrades were martyred by Auca Indians on the Curaray River in the jungles of Ecuador. Elliot once wrote in his journal,
“God, I pray Thee, light these idle sticks of my life and may I burn for Thee. Consume my life, my God, for it is Thine. I seek not a long life, but a full one, like you, Lord Jesus. … Saturate me with the oil of the Spirit that I may be aflame. But flame is often short-lived. Canst thou bear this, my soul? Short life? In me there dwells the spirit of the Great Short-Lived, whose zeal for God’s house consumed Him. ‘Make me Thy fuel, Flame of God.’”
Jim Elliot seemed to know that suffering and martyrdom awaited him, and yet, his prayer was not for safety, or comfort, or longer life, but for greater zeal, and greater impact for the glory of God. His concern was not avoiding suffering, but growing in his love and affection for the Lord Jesus. In his journal he quoted the words of the hymn, “Be Thou the object bright and fair to fill and satisfy the heart. My hope to meet Thee in the air, and nevermore from Thee to part!” Elliot’s concern was loving Jesus more, glorifying God more, and staying faithful come what may.
What motivates such sacrificial service to advance the gospel of Jesus Christ? The love of Christ. The Lord’s love for us and our love for Him. Speaking of his own missionary work, the apostle Paul wrote (2 Cor. 5:14), “For the love of Christ compels us.” The motive is love. Love is the power of obedience. Love is the power of duty. Love is the power of service. Love is the power of sacrifice. Love is the power of worship. Love is the power of fellowship.
Peter and the other apostles will faithfully follow Jesus and give their lives in serving the Lord. Why? Love. Notice Jesus’ emphasis on love in our text today, John 21:15-25:
15 So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Feed My lambs.” 16 He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Tend My sheep.” 17 He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.” Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep. 18 Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish.” 19 This He spoke, signifying by what death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me.”
20 Then Peter, turning around, saw the disciple whom Jesus loved following, who also had leaned on His breast at the supper, and said, “Lord, who is the one who betrays You?” 21 Peter, seeing him, said to Jesus, “But Lord, what about this man?” 22 Jesus said to him, “If I will that he remain till I come, what is that to you? You follow Me.” 23 Then this saying went out among the brethren that this disciple would not die. Yet Jesus did not say to him that he would not die, but, “If I will that he remain till I come, what is that to you?”
24 This is the disciple who testifies of these things, and wrote these things; and we know that his testimony is true. 25 And there are also many other things that Jesus did, which if they were written one by one, I suppose that even the world itself could not contain the books that would be written. Amen.
Remember last time we saw that this is the third time that Jesus appears to the group of disciples after His resurrection. They are in Galilee where Jesus has just produced a miraculous catch of fish and then provided breakfast for the disciples on the shore. Peter was the disciple most at the center of attention in this event. It was Peter who declared (John 21:3), “I am going fishing.” After catching the multitude of fish, when John told him, “It is the Lord!” Peter jumped out of the boat and swam to be the first one to reach Jesus (John 21:7). When the Lord said (John 21:10), “Bring some of the fish which you have just caught,” it was Peter who dragged the whole net of large fish to the shore alone (John 21:11).
There is one detail from our text last week that I did not draw your attention to, but it sets the stage for what happens in our text today. In John 21:9 we’re told that, “Then, as soon as they had come to land, they saw a fire of coals there, and fish laid on it, and bread.” Focus on that “fire of coals.” The only other place in the New Testament where we find that phrase is in John 18:18 when Peter stood warming himself by a fire of coals in the courtyard of the high priest as Jesus stands trial. It was there that Peter denied the Lord three times before the rooster crowed just as Jesus predicted.
It happened the very night that Jesus had demonstrated His great love by washing Peter’s feet. Jesus had just commanded His disciples to love one another as He has loved them (John 13:34). Peter then boldly declared to Jesus (John 13:37), “I will lay down my life for Your sake.” In John 13:38, “Jesus answered him, ‘Will you lay down your life for My sake? Most assuredly, I say to you, the rooster shall not crow till you have denied Me three times.’”
And John 18 records how it happened that night by the fire of coals. Peter had denied the Lord repeatedly; disowned Him vehemently; failed miserably; sinned publicly. Peter needed to be restored. God has very significant plans for this denying, impatient, impulsive man named Simon Peter. This short exchange between the risen Lord Jesus and Peter represents his public restoration to his apostolic ministry. It shows us the wonderful grace and forgiveness of our Lord. It also shows the love that the Lord desires of those who would be His disciples.
1. The Lord calls disciples to love Him (John 21:15-17)
John 21:15 begins, “So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter.” Later in this passage we get the impression that Jesus and Peter were walking together with John kind of tagging along behind. Jesus asks Peter three questions. Remember what we have learned throughout the gospel: Jesus never asks a question that He does not already know the answer to. He asks so that Peter will probe his own heart.
A. The heart of discipleship is a love relationship with Jesus.
Peter had denied the Lord three times and so three times Jesus repeats the essential question, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” These three questions hit Peter like repeated hammer blows to drive the point home—three times, the third time with grief because it reminded him of his threefold denials. Peter affirmed each time, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” And, three times the Lord responded to Peter’s affirmation of love, “Feed My lambs. … Tend My sheep. … Feed My sheep.” The point is, loving Jesus because He has forgiven all your sins is essential for serving Him.
It is significant that Jesus calls Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah,” because that was his name before his life was changed by Jesus. John 1:42 records that when Andrew brought his brother to Jesus, “Now when Jesus looked at him, He said, “You are Simon the son of Jonah. You shall be called Cephas” (which is translated, Peter, a Rock).” In Matthew 16 when Simon Peter confesses (Matt. 16:16), “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God,” Jesus said to him, “Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah, for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but My Father who is in heaven. And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it.” By God’s grace, Simon the son of Jonah became Peter the rock. Jesus underscores His grace by calling Peter by his original name, “Simon, son of Jonah.” It reminded Peter of who he had been in the flesh.
The first question Jesus asks is (John 21:15), “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?” Who or what are “these”? Peter had just gone back to fishing. The boat and nets were there on the shore. Was Jesus referring to those? Peter had once forsook his old life as a fisherman to become a fisher of men (Luke 5:10-11). Did he love Jesus more than his old life?
But I think more likely, Jesus was referring to the other disciples who were with them there on that beach in Galilee. In the upper room, Peter had boasted that even if the other disciples stumbled and denied Jesus, he never would (John 13:37; Matt. 26:33). Peter proved that he was not as faithful to The Lord—above all the others—as he boasted in the flesh that he would be. He was just as weak in the flesh and just as much in need of grace and forgiveness as everyone else.
Peter’s answer shows that he has learned the lesson of humility. He is no longer boasting of his love for Jesus. Instead he replies (John 21:17), “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You,”. It’s not enough to say that we love Jesus or sing that we love Jesus. Anybody can do that. Rather, love for Jesus must come from the heart, which only God knows.
You may be aware that John uses two different words for “love” in this dialogue. The first two times that Jesus asks Peter, “Do you love Me?” He uses the Greek verb agapao, the word that best signifies sacrificial love. Peter replies using the Greek verb phileo, the word that describes strong affection. But when Jesus asks the third time, He uses phileo and Peter replies again with phileo. Does John intend a significance in this? John often uses synonyms for stylistic variation. In our text, he uses two different words for “know,” two for “feed,” and two for “sheep”. Perhaps Peter knew that the Lord understood that he had strong affection for Him; but he didn’t feel he could claim the kind of readiness to sacrifice that he once boasted.
Our love for the Lord must encompass aspects of both agapao and phileo. It’s like my love for Kathy. Over 35 years ago, I committed myself to love her exclusively until death do we part. That agape commitment is the basis for the phileo relationship that we have built over the years. And while our relationship is not built on feelings, but rather commitment, I do have strong feelings of affection for her. If the feelings were never there, something serious would be wrong with our relationship. The same should be true of your love for the Lord. It’s based on commitment, it consists of a growing relationship, and it often involves strong feelings.
The main point is clear. Loving Jesus from the heart is the essential nature of my relationship with God. Jesus focuses Peter’s attention first on his love relationship with the Lord. That has to be right before we can effectively serve the Lord. In John 21:17 when Jesus asks the third time, “Do you love me?” John writes, “Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, ‘Do you love Me?’ And he said to Him, ‘Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.’” Jesus knew it would cause Peter to be grieved. But the Lord also knew that grieving over our sins is a necessary part of being restored from those sins to a place of useful service for Him. “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted” (Matt. 5:4). No one can properly serve the Lord who shrugs off sin as no big deal. And no one can have the deep love for Jesus that sustains ministry who doesn’t appreciate the awful price that He paid to redeem us from our sins. So when we do sin, we need to confess it to the Lord and feel the grief that our sin causes Him.
B. We show love for Jesus by serving others.
Three times the Lord drives home to Peter that if he loves Him, he is to tend or shepherd His sheep (“Feed My lambs. … Tend My sheep. … Feed My sheep”). “Feed” means to feed a flock, to give them nourishment (Matt. 8:30; Luke 15:15). To “tend” is related to the word shepherd and thus refers to all of the activities of that job, including feeding, guarding, guiding, and caring for the well-being of the flock. Peter uses the same word in 1 Peter 5 when writing instructions to the elders in the church:
1 The elders who are among you I exhort, I who am a fellow elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, and also a partaker of the glory that will be revealed: 2 Shepherd the flock of God which is among you, serving as overseers, not by compulsion but willingly, not for dishonest gain but eagerly; 3 nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock; 4 and when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that does not fade away. (1 Pet. 5:1-4)
Shepherding the Lord’s flock is primarily the job of the elders in each local church. Paul exhorted the Ephesian elders (Acts 20:28), “Therefore take heed to yourselves and to all the flock, among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the church of God which He purchased with His own blood.” The main job of a pastor should be to feed God’s flock from His Word.
Three times Jesus refers to the church as His: “My lambs … My sheep … My sheep.” Lambs are the little ones, the tender and needy part of the flock. Sheep are the mature ones. They are all His. They don’t belong to any pastor, but to the Lord. And since they belong to the Lord, who bought them with His own blood, pastors should be diligent to care for each one and love each one because each one is precious to Jesus.
It always bothers me when I see Christians despise or put down other Christians. I know, some of the sheep can be irritating! They can be self-centered, stubborn, and difficult to be around. But if Jesus loved them enough to die for them, then we all must love them, too. They’re His sheep!
Now you may be thinking, “Thankfully, Pastor, that’s your job, not mine!” But not so fast! Granted, shepherding the sheep is the primary job of the elders. But that doesn’t mean they are the only ones who must do it. Older believers should shepherd those who are younger in the Lord. Husbands must shepherd their families and feed them from God’s Word. Fathers and mothers should teach their children the ways of the Lord.
The “one another” passages in the New Testament show that shepherding the Lord’s flock is the responsibility of every growing member of the church. We are all called to love one another (John 13:34); to receive one another (Rom. 15:7); to admonish one another (Rom. 15:14); to serve one another (Gal. 5:13); to bear with one another in love (Eph. 4:2); to teach one another (Col 3:16); to submit to one another (Eph. 5:21); to comfort and edify one another (1 Thess. 5:11); exhort one another (Heb. 3:13); pray for one another (James 5:16); and minister to one another (1 Pet. 5:5).
Paul wrote in Ephesians 4 that the Lord gave some to be pastors and teachers, “… for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ,” (Eph. 4:12-13). My job is to equip you to serve the Lord. All the “saints”, every member of the church, is to do the “work of ministry” as the Lord gifts and calls us to serve Him.
Why do we serve our fellow sheep? Because we love the Chief Shepherd (1 Pet. 5:4) and want to please Him. Love for Jesus is what keeps you serving His sheep, tending His flock, feeding His lambs. Any other motivation will end in discouragement. Your love for Jesus has to undergird your service to His sheep or you’ll get hurt or disgusted and quit serving. Love for Jesus is what keeps you going when the sheep are ornery or stubborn or disagreeable.
Do you love Jesus? Is He what gets you going in the morning? Is Jesus the one who satisfies your every longing? Is He your treasure and great reward? Is serving Him your highest pleasure? Do you love Jesus?
Like Jim Elliot, can you say to Jesus,
Be Thou the object bright and fair
To fill and satisfy the heart;
My hope to meet Thee in the air,
And nevermore from Thee to part;
That I may undistracted be
To follow, serve, and wait for Thee.
(Hymn by G.W.Frazer, Have I An Object, Lord Below)
